Some miscellaneous thoughts…
I was walking through Stop & Shop today. As I crossed where a typical mid-store aisle met a main edge-of-store aisle, a man approached and we headed towards each other. With my boot on, I am not very fast. The man decided he could not wait for me to cross his path, so he darted in front of me as clearly whatever he was buying was more important than anything else, and I stumbled as I avoided walking into him. I let him know verbally what I thought of this, and he quickly scurried away, avoiding eye contact. That one was odd to me, but thinking about it, I probably did similar things to others. Now, I will be more sensitive, more courteous.
My disability is temporary. I am on the road to recovery to walking, then running, again. I won’t pretend like my situation compares to those far more severe, but I have come away with insight in the world of the disabled. The world is not an easy place for the disabled. I am amazed at the strength of those permanently and/or far more set back than I am.
I am amazed at how impatient people can be. Why is everyone in such a damned rush? Where is the fire?
I am amazed at how kind they can be as well. People, total strangers, have offered acts of kindness to me. That is the cool part, to see that there is good, to feel the good, and to know that I must return the good to others.
Over this past weekend, I met two people who had ankle injuries similar to mine. A woman’s jaw dropped as I named the two ligaments I tore, as she had torn the same two … 30 years prior. She showed me her ankles, one looked good, one looked horrible. She had NOT repaired it back then, now beyond hope, and she mentioned ankle fusion as her choice today. She said that she knew such surgeries like mine were hard to bear, but were absolutely the right choice to do it early while the joint can be restored.
The other person, a man, was screwed by the system (between jobs, COBRA foul up, etc.) but still did the surgery. His was a bit more involved, but he was mobile. He too said it was painful and tough, but worth it. He was walking quite normally.
I am amazed at how many foot/ankle injuries there are out there. Wow. Jared, a young athletic guy at the PT place, described the massacre he did on his ankle, and he is hopping around near the tail end of his full recovery.
At PT today, I was using the BAPS board, a device designed to help folks like me get ankles working again. For now, I have to tilt the device forward to 12 o’clock, back to 6, and side to side from 3 to 9. Because my foot was everted in the cast, 3 o’clock was virtually a gimmee. 9 was hard but I got it. Forward (open the foot, like one might do in a swimming kick) to 12 also worked. 6 o’clock was killing me, just could not get that foot closed up to tilt back.
Until today. A gentle and barely audible “tap” as the board tapped to 6 o’clock. I was happy. I could not get it within 1 inch of the floor just days ago. That 6 o’clock tap means the foot function that helps us walk is coming back to me. Nice!
This process is demanding patience, forcing me to set reasonable expectations and goals, and measure progress as the process unfolds. Hard for me, maybe the first time for me that a situation forced me to do … a life lesson?
Rolf Arands, Runner 